How Can I Learn To Reconnect With My Perceptions?

When I was a child I experienced a lot of horrible trauma. Part of the way that I coped and survived was by disconnecting myself from my body.



I learnt to take my mind and all that is my essence away. I'd drift far away so I wouldn't have to experience what was happening to me.



This is a part of childhood that my subconscious mind holds on to and projects into my present life. A defense reaction that once was my ally, now a nemesis of sorts. My interactions with people and my environment are susquently hindered as my default position always seems to be set on the urgent "Vacate You Body Now".



I feel like I'm stuck here and I'd like to grow past it. I no longer need this tool from my childhood but my brain is so paranoid that I'm still under threat it won't let me rest.

Any advice you could lend would be greatly appreciated. Be Nice :) I'm a magic flower trying to grow. Water me with goodness.

How Can I Learn To Reconnect With My Perceptions?
Well, I think you may have to go through the "wall of fire". What I mean is, yes, I completely understand what you're saying. It's like having a suit of armor, that served you well when you were under attack, but...."uh, gee, this thing is getting a little heavy now....I can't seem to move the way I want to....." etc. You (your adult conscious mind) are going to have to "revisit" some of the painful areas, in order to unify yourself once again. You can talk to yourself, as the Adult, as in "You are safe now, and I will protect you. You will never have to go through THAT again."



I think of it like "defrosting". When someone has been in the snow for a long time, on the verge of dying, it is painful for them to get up and get the blood flowing. You're going to have to do something like that, to reconnect. It may hurt, but remind yourself how strong you really are. It will help if you make a commitment to yourself, that you deserve to live the rest of your life, being able to feel the full range of emotions that humans are capable of -- and the most powerful force, is Love. Take small steps at first. Get "reacquainted" with what you are actually feeling. It can take some time -- what at first seems like "anger" becomes instead "hurt", "disappointed", "frustrated" etc. Be patient with yourself, but also push yourself to do things that may seem very uncomfortable right now.



Be brave, and keep safe.



You WILL get through this. You are a kind and compassionate person; that will be your strength.
Reply:well, i think you really need to talk to someone about the things that happened to you, a counsler or therapist..if your already doing that, the second best thing i think is writing in a journal..but it seems like you really need someone to talk to and maybe even a medication until you can accept some of the things that happened to you.
Reply:No offense but 96% of the world population has the same problem. They got too much money and not enough love. They had no money and ate cereal twice a day. They were sexually abused by relatives or whoever. They were neglected and beat. The list goes on and on. When I talk about my childhood, I laugh although it was tough. My childhood was so tough that shrinks do not believe a person could go through so much, I survived and do not dwell on the past. My daily Bible readings have had such an impact that I see today. Look at the trees, birds, and everything around you. Every time you start feeling sad, let yourself do so for 15 min. then start looking at the beauty around you; you may wish to think of all of those who are going through touchier and realize how thankful you should be. A shrink may find a chemical imbalance. You may want to start with a shrink.
Reply:Yes, I have heard of this and experienced too this as a child. There is a medical term for it. As a child, I would tell my mother during very stressful times, "I feel like I am not really here." I can even remember my gums getting numb. Sounds weird, I know.

You need to see a neuro phsychologist for some answers. Best of luck you.
Reply:Try writting in blogs to get things off your mind or out in the open. See if that helps.
Reply:1) ask a male friend to steal the hunkiest guy in the gym that you find attractive's jock strap put it beside your bed for one pm

2) find the perfect food that makes you smile - that you can't live without, regardless of calories and have it served at 1pm on Sat

3) download a pic of the hottest guy that you can't live without and pin it above your bed at 1pm

4) get a good manicure booked for saturday at 1pm and have her include foot massage

5) did you have a favorite group, put it on at 1pm.

Broken Teeth